Hello I'm Jac! and i'm back i'll make this somewhat quick , its been what 13 days since i last posted Thanksgiving has come and gone and i decided to get serious. What i mean by that, is that i'm somewhat of a Overachieveing-Underachieveing glacier slow perfectionist when it comes to my music, so long story short( By that i mean i'm not going to go into details or tell the whole story...) anyway i've written, copyrighted and composed 28 songs thats alot , but of the 28 i have probably half completed 2( When i say completed i'm refering to production, you know adding other intruments, mixing, equalizing etc,etc..) I consider my un-finished material , as sketches, or rough drafts because they consists of one or two intruments and i haven't polished their sound, soooo since i have been putting alot of dishes on my table( a meal comparison to the amount of work i'm doing..) I've decided to put up some , a few, a handful of musical sketches( rough drafts ) why? why not. Their'll be examples of the creative process at work you'll watch them evole on Jacmania online.com/home page 2, from the mistake stained unbalanced rough draft , into musical work of art, I like this idea and i'm going to enjoy sharing the process and my music with you. Fyi ( For your information ) i'm not a singer but i attempt to lay down the lyrics on some of my songs, so comment on the singing i'm a musician now with that said "Stay crunchy".
Footnote : It's probably better to listen with earphones or speaker extension i produced and recorded these song in stereo with certain special audio effects, just letting you know that the regular speakers on your computer takes some of the effects, away from some songs like metal Jac!
Friday, November 30, 2012
Saturday, November 17, 2012
Fade Away
She rolled her eye's turned away, without even a goodbye she had nothing to say *
I believed in what we had i believed in us, I fooled myself i believed to much *
She walked toward a car and opened the door, I followed behind asking for something more *
Why are you going what have i done? Your always wanting to talk, now you just want to run *
Nothing is said she doesn't even look me in the eye, Oh did i tell in the drivers seat was some guy *
He smile at me and gives me the peace sign, and says i hope you didn't kiss her, 'cause this mourning she was mine *
My pain evaporate's and i start to shake, But then he drives off quickly and i hear something break *
A sharp pain engulf's me and my eye's have become watery, Somethings broke, i'm in pain and now i can't see *
Dude has my girl and what ever she took, add insult to injury he just broke my foot *
The next day around 3pm i make it back home, and i guess i wasn't dreaming, once again i'm alone *
But she came by while i was gone and cleaned out the apartment, It's my fault, i'm to blame i should not have told where i went *
It's 6 weeks later and i'm sitting here on the floor, I lost my job, i have no electricity i just sit here drinking cheap wine from the store *
This is how i'll deal with it, in this dark room and filth i'll stay, Their's a big rat across from me watching me Fade away.....
Copyright 2012 Generation Jac! Publishing
I believed in what we had i believed in us, I fooled myself i believed to much *
She walked toward a car and opened the door, I followed behind asking for something more *
Why are you going what have i done? Your always wanting to talk, now you just want to run *
Nothing is said she doesn't even look me in the eye, Oh did i tell in the drivers seat was some guy *
He smile at me and gives me the peace sign, and says i hope you didn't kiss her, 'cause this mourning she was mine *
My pain evaporate's and i start to shake, But then he drives off quickly and i hear something break *
A sharp pain engulf's me and my eye's have become watery, Somethings broke, i'm in pain and now i can't see *
Dude has my girl and what ever she took, add insult to injury he just broke my foot *
The next day around 3pm i make it back home, and i guess i wasn't dreaming, once again i'm alone *
But she came by while i was gone and cleaned out the apartment, It's my fault, i'm to blame i should not have told where i went *
It's 6 weeks later and i'm sitting here on the floor, I lost my job, i have no electricity i just sit here drinking cheap wine from the store *
This is how i'll deal with it, in this dark room and filth i'll stay, Their's a big rat across from me watching me Fade away.....
Copyright 2012 Generation Jac! Publishing
Monster.....
Is it fair to make a being to raise with a name, neglect , abuse and riddicule to shame.. * Feed it, curse it and throw it out , then wonder what its rage is all about..*
I dont claim perfection, nowhere am i close, I have never been a model to be copied or invoked, I know, my personality is a force of nature overwelming at times but nothing to fear..*
Look in the mirror or any object that cast a reflection, your image is a wittness to my vindication, I do my own thing i can not conform , I am different have always been since the day i was born..*
I belong to no group am part of no cast, A prisoner of the future, who's chased by the past, Labeled by others a troublesome bad seed, but i never turn my back on those in need..*
My mistakes are plenty and by them i could fall, but my good on the scales levels it all, What does that make me, for that matter us we've all done deeds to loose or gain trust..*
I'm a creature of habit but also the unexpected i keep my emotions well protected, I may not do or say what is liked or wanted but does that make me a MONSTER ...............
Copyright 2012 Generation Jac! Publishing
I dont claim perfection, nowhere am i close, I have never been a model to be copied or invoked, I know, my personality is a force of nature overwelming at times but nothing to fear..*
Look in the mirror or any object that cast a reflection, your image is a wittness to my vindication, I do my own thing i can not conform , I am different have always been since the day i was born..*
I belong to no group am part of no cast, A prisoner of the future, who's chased by the past, Labeled by others a troublesome bad seed, but i never turn my back on those in need..*
My mistakes are plenty and by them i could fall, but my good on the scales levels it all, What does that make me, for that matter us we've all done deeds to loose or gain trust..*
I'm a creature of habit but also the unexpected i keep my emotions well protected, I may not do or say what is liked or wanted but does that make me a MONSTER ...............
Copyright 2012 Generation Jac! Publishing
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| Vampire Jac! |
Monday, November 12, 2012
Flaws by J@c!...
Are you broken beyond repair, standing beneath a shattered sky, gasping for air...............
Wounds deeper then the oceans, with turbulent waves of emotions......................................
Have you examined your life, brought the hidden things to light..........................................
And by what ever means, picked the bones clean....................................................................
Exposeing beyond all doubt, a truth for which you are about................................................
You are a faultline a tornado, it was secret but now they know..............................................
A skeleton in the back room of your mind, has taken on the life of another kind.................
All your flaws are now visible people point and stare, no longer can you pretend like you don't care.............................................................................................................................................
You grit your teeth and close your eyes, but the wounds are so deep you just can't cry.........
So you search and you seekout a friendly face, someone to help you find your place............
Someone to give meaning and understand, to speak plainly and take a stand........................
Who will not see you through the window of your crimes, but see you as the here and now and the past as forgotten time..................................................................................................................
All the others who have come and gone, saw your past and all your wrongs..........................
Condemned you as bad and a viral plight, scarring you for the rest of your life.....................
But in your pain and stress, a friend will pull you from the mess.............................................
And see you for you and not what they saw, because when they looked all they saw was flaws.
Copyright 2012 Generation Jac! Publishing
Wounds deeper then the oceans, with turbulent waves of emotions......................................
Have you examined your life, brought the hidden things to light..........................................
And by what ever means, picked the bones clean....................................................................
Exposeing beyond all doubt, a truth for which you are about................................................
You are a faultline a tornado, it was secret but now they know..............................................
A skeleton in the back room of your mind, has taken on the life of another kind.................
All your flaws are now visible people point and stare, no longer can you pretend like you don't care.............................................................................................................................................
You grit your teeth and close your eyes, but the wounds are so deep you just can't cry.........
So you search and you seekout a friendly face, someone to help you find your place............
Someone to give meaning and understand, to speak plainly and take a stand........................
Who will not see you through the window of your crimes, but see you as the here and now and the past as forgotten time..................................................................................................................
All the others who have come and gone, saw your past and all your wrongs..........................
Condemned you as bad and a viral plight, scarring you for the rest of your life.....................
But in your pain and stress, a friend will pull you from the mess.............................................
And see you for you and not what they saw, because when they looked all they saw was flaws.
Copyright 2012 Generation Jac! Publishing
Saturday, November 3, 2012
Freeze...
I woke up with her image in my head , So i laid there trying to dream again in bed , I know theirs no chance she's thinking of me, but i can't help, but believe she's what i need....
Do you know what its like to be in a deep freeze, to be a closed book no one else can read, to chill the blood of a helping hand , and make them tremble where they stand....
A slow moving glacier at a moment in time, a calm outside appearance that's crumbling inside, I sit alone as life and time walk by, With only myself for company until i heard "hi"......
"What?," i said , as i turned and looked in her eye's, and with a non assuming smile she once again said "hi.....
I wasn't sure what to say, but i begain feeling something.. deeply , She didn't seem to mind...my silence she just stared at me sweetly , I wanted to speak but was afraid my voice would crack , so i turned away and looked down and never spoke back.....
But this intoxicating beauty sitting next to me, never gave up in her attempts to get me to speak , Damn my frozen heart and love scarred mind, I can't get out! i've imprisoned myself in my own self pitying shrine.....
What power can pull the radiance, and beauty from the heavens to the ground, and place it in the most appealing of forms and next to me sit it down...
That's what i thought to myself , but it had no meaning to no one but myself....
Well it doesn't matter, is the lie that i told , she wasn't in to me, but i will never know.....
As she stood she smiled as if to let me know , I was interested i wanted to talk but out of fear you froze......
Copyright 2012 Generation Jac! Publishing
Do you know what its like to be in a deep freeze, to be a closed book no one else can read, to chill the blood of a helping hand , and make them tremble where they stand....
A slow moving glacier at a moment in time, a calm outside appearance that's crumbling inside, I sit alone as life and time walk by, With only myself for company until i heard "hi"......
"What?," i said , as i turned and looked in her eye's, and with a non assuming smile she once again said "hi.....
I wasn't sure what to say, but i begain feeling something.. deeply , She didn't seem to mind...my silence she just stared at me sweetly , I wanted to speak but was afraid my voice would crack , so i turned away and looked down and never spoke back.....
But this intoxicating beauty sitting next to me, never gave up in her attempts to get me to speak , Damn my frozen heart and love scarred mind, I can't get out! i've imprisoned myself in my own self pitying shrine.....
What power can pull the radiance, and beauty from the heavens to the ground, and place it in the most appealing of forms and next to me sit it down...
That's what i thought to myself , but it had no meaning to no one but myself....
Well it doesn't matter, is the lie that i told , she wasn't in to me, but i will never know.....
As she stood she smiled as if to let me know , I was interested i wanted to talk but out of fear you froze......
Copyright 2012 Generation Jac! Publishing
Real Life
No one has ever promised you a rose garden, so why do so many people think they are due something in which they have not worked or givin sweat for? : Good question, let me tell you why.
When were born we have unlimited, and unknown potential as we grow we discover each what we are capable of and what we're incapable of, we start to learn what we like, what we dislike in time we realize that we have a gift for something no one else can do in the manner that we can do.
So at an early age (let's say 8 through 12 ) we decide in our minds that this is something we want to do, were happy we share it with our family and friends, now in fantasy land that would be the end of the story their would be a happy ending those young children would achieve their dreams and live happy ever after, but this is real life and in real life in some families when a child approaches an adult family member with dreams and aspirations their slapped down and step on, their dreams are cast in to the trash can along side that adult family members dreams.
And if its not the mother, father, aunt , uncle or grandparents who crushes the life out of that childs hopes, and dreams its a sibling or friend, or teacher if you posses the special gift of singing and at a young age you begin to explore that talent seeing were you can take it and while learning all that you can about your abilities, and your gift your suddenly told your singing sounds like ( Just adding a little humor here :) glass bottles being broke over a homeles man's head, your going to be devastated and most likely that will be the last time you will be open publicly about what your true talent is , for the most part people who experience this type of negative enforcement about something they truely believe they can do effortlessly at a young age wheather its singing, danceing, drawing, math, reading you name it once they've been riddiculed they shut down and move on to persue something they don't love , but doesn't bring any riddicule they attempt to excell and some may , but their never happy.
The purpose of this post is to simply say be careful about, and at times police what you say to young children , I've met lots of people ( Adults ) who are very talented , creative, good organizers , but when they were young something was told to them that stop their momentum and march towards their dream, and once the words of discouragement took root in their mind no one chose to support them by motivating them to believe in what they can be, I know at times it can be hard to remember to say to your child "Great job, or your going to be a success", because real life happens so imagine how hard it is to say to an adult those same words , but maybe its time we did i've wittness personally individuals some of whom are followers of this blog, who have phenominal talent singing , writing , danceing, instrument playing so i make it a point to complement talent when i see it, regardless of what type of skills, or abilities if some one displays a gift or does something well "Don't hate , Praise them", in doing so your helping humanity by reduceing the number of people on this planet who think that by just being alive they deserve something with out struggling , and working for it, this is Real life nothing's free.
Real life is what happen's when you get a backbone, and except responsibility your actions , You are and will always be what you think you are , do you want to be a success "Be it", do you want to be a failure " Be it". - Jac!
Copyright 2012 Generation Jac! Publishing
When were born we have unlimited, and unknown potential as we grow we discover each what we are capable of and what we're incapable of, we start to learn what we like, what we dislike in time we realize that we have a gift for something no one else can do in the manner that we can do.
So at an early age (let's say 8 through 12 ) we decide in our minds that this is something we want to do, were happy we share it with our family and friends, now in fantasy land that would be the end of the story their would be a happy ending those young children would achieve their dreams and live happy ever after, but this is real life and in real life in some families when a child approaches an adult family member with dreams and aspirations their slapped down and step on, their dreams are cast in to the trash can along side that adult family members dreams.
And if its not the mother, father, aunt , uncle or grandparents who crushes the life out of that childs hopes, and dreams its a sibling or friend, or teacher if you posses the special gift of singing and at a young age you begin to explore that talent seeing were you can take it and while learning all that you can about your abilities, and your gift your suddenly told your singing sounds like ( Just adding a little humor here :) glass bottles being broke over a homeles man's head, your going to be devastated and most likely that will be the last time you will be open publicly about what your true talent is , for the most part people who experience this type of negative enforcement about something they truely believe they can do effortlessly at a young age wheather its singing, danceing, drawing, math, reading you name it once they've been riddiculed they shut down and move on to persue something they don't love , but doesn't bring any riddicule they attempt to excell and some may , but their never happy.
The purpose of this post is to simply say be careful about, and at times police what you say to young children , I've met lots of people ( Adults ) who are very talented , creative, good organizers , but when they were young something was told to them that stop their momentum and march towards their dream, and once the words of discouragement took root in their mind no one chose to support them by motivating them to believe in what they can be, I know at times it can be hard to remember to say to your child "Great job, or your going to be a success", because real life happens so imagine how hard it is to say to an adult those same words , but maybe its time we did i've wittness personally individuals some of whom are followers of this blog, who have phenominal talent singing , writing , danceing, instrument playing so i make it a point to complement talent when i see it, regardless of what type of skills, or abilities if some one displays a gift or does something well "Don't hate , Praise them", in doing so your helping humanity by reduceing the number of people on this planet who think that by just being alive they deserve something with out struggling , and working for it, this is Real life nothing's free.
Real life is what happen's when you get a backbone, and except responsibility your actions , You are and will always be what you think you are , do you want to be a success "Be it", do you want to be a failure " Be it". - Jac!
Copyright 2012 Generation Jac! Publishing
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