Slash & Burn

Dedicated to those who see no way out.


I am alive, I am alive despite the emptiness in my eyes, you can laugh and whisper behind my back, but i am dead so immune to all your attacks****
Don't ask me questions about whats going on in my head, don't act like you care, about the things I've said****
My long sleeves are like shields as i make myself invisible, I do this for protection against the critical stares from people****   
Why do i feel this way what has brought me to this end, who threw the rock that left me broken****

I ask myself over and over again as i shrunk away from family and friends
who's to blame myself i know, But they're other who forced me down this road****
Each line i make represents a word, every cut that's deep is something painful i heard****
Every drop of blood is a tear I've shed, For the many hateful words about me said****
The four walls of my room is where i like to be, there I'm listened to the walls hear me****

I cut and burn to know that i'm still alive, I have to i have no control i'm dead inside****
Both my arms look like road maps when they're turned, And there's no where else to cut that's why i started to burn****
Its an strange feeling being addicted to self inflicted pain, I say i don't like but each day its the same****
My family and friends don't know what to do, they just smile and say they love but i know its not true****
Once i'm out of the hospital they yell and call me name's, Nothing ever change's not a damn thing has change****

You say you want to help me you want me alive, I don't want your help i just want to die****
I self harm because i'm not whole, No one has ever truly cared to help me get control****
If i didn't have to be here i'd get out now, Maybe one of my cuts will get infected and end it some how****
Alone unwanted an unread book, Never given a second glance never given a second look****
The one in the corner with nothing to say, the one who's told your in the way****

In a room alone with something to hide, Secrets you bury so you can live your life****    
You don't want to die but..........


Written by Metal Jac! Sabertooth

Copyright 2013  Generation Jac! Publishing

Dance

I walk with no where in particular to go,  No one really knows me although we walk the same road....
As i travel the extensive broken ashphalt lane, expecting to see something different but the sceneries the same....
Long journey's are shorten with someone by your side, when you grow weary you look into their eye's....
Your energized with a desire to impress, you do more than endure you do more than your best....
Thats the nature when two become one, A partnership to overcome and get the job done....
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But thats wishful thinking by a romanticizing man, Who's mind wandering while watching a couple holding hands....
In the wasteland and desert of broken hearts and dreams, Its a superhuman feat to be loved like a human being....
A wanderer among the desert of broken hearts, Trying to find pieces that match but its hard....
If your one of many vagabonds of love takin for granted and pushed away, Always on trial for things you didnt do or say....
Wanting and desireing to be part of something special and unique, But afraid to step forward and reluctant to peek....
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Believeing past rejections will raise their ugly heads, and take the small part of you thats not yet dead....
How sad but true on a sunny day the clouds follow you, As you sit in a croweded room your thoughts debate, How misery and lonlinees came together fro a date....
You take your hand from your forehead stand up and advance, No one else knows your alive so you ask lonliness for a Dance....


Copyright 2013 Generation Jac! Publishing    

Despite Words in my head......

I felt my heart jump in my chest, so powerful the leap i lost my breath, the first time in a long while i felt that way, i wondered if the feeling would stay.....
I found myself walking on air, everyone wondering how i got up there, this was more than imagination, So i strecthed out my arms in anticipation....
Expecting to recieve a long awaited reward, redemption for all my heart has endured..
Turning my ears from all that has been said, despite the words running through my head....
You cant be that gullible or trusting indeed, Why do you go looking to be decieved always wanting an embrace or a kind word spoken, from those who you know are shattered and broken, what you get you will deserve, because to them a kind word is just a word....
You will be acknowledged and leaned on when their blue, then thrown away when they've gotten their use....
I listened and thought about what was said, Ignored it all got hurt despite the words in my head.....